A Day at the Park

This week, we have a fairly young team of mostly high school and college-aged students. Today, we spent the day with the team and the Good Samaritan Kids at the park. There is a local church that has some walled off land with a playing field, play equipment, and basketball court. It was a beautiful day, filled with love, laughter, and play!

Swings!

Love (that is her real name!) pushing her older sister, Kevencia and Junior.

See-saw!!!

The older girls still find the play equipment entertaining!

Lens and Kylie playing together.

Penetrating the Darkness

A few weeks ago, my home church, Daybreak, asked if I would record my story on the topic of Penetrating the Darkness. Here is what I wrote for the recording:

My name is Kimberlee and I live and work in Port-au-Prince, Haiti. My main job is to serve in a Girls Home Orphanage working with 23 girls from ages 8-21. I also get to work in a tent city doing Community Development, and helping with teams on week-long trips.  

As I’m sure you have heard, there are many dark places in Haiti. I usually don’t go a day without seeing a family living in a tent or a mother who can’t feed her child; children without shoes and a baby without parents; a father desperately trying to find a job or a husband that abuses his wife. Most of the times, it’s too much for me to take. I very quickly and easily become overwhelmed.

But, I’m finding that God’s first desire of me isn’t to penetrate this darkness in Haiti…it is to penetrate the darkness in my heart.  Those dark places where I find my worth in what I’m doing - in what I’ve accomplished. Where I see my value in:

-       How many buildings I have helped build

-       How much food I have handed out

-       How fast the girls I work with are learning computer skills.

In the midst of trying to rack up the numbers, I hear God say this:

“Kimberlee, would you be still long enough to find your worth in me? That no matter what you do or don’t do, I LOVE YOU. You are already worth it. You are good enough.”

When I first take the time to fill the dark places in my heart with these truths, I begin to outwardly penetrate the darkness in Haiti naturally.  I can rest while I am working. Because I can confidently rest in who I am, and not the measurable outcomes I produce, I am free to take the time to:

-       get to know a Haitian and help teach him how to build a house alongside of me…even if it means less houses being built

-       to train a Haitian in a skill so she can earn an income to buy her own food, therefore increasing her self-esteem and self-sustainability

-       to continue teaching computer classes, ever so slowly and inefficiently due to my lack of language skills and cultural differences, trusting that the girls just need me to be present in their lives - seeing my effort as love.

Penetrating the darkness is more about slowing down enough to hear the Spirit speaking.  And I heard once before that the Spirit very rarely respects one’s comfort zones. How true that is! The Spirit often calls us to take a risk. Not a risk to DO more, or work HARDER, or SERVE longer. But a risk that is uncomfortable. That thing that usually sits in my gut and I say, “Ok, God, later. Next week I’ll talk to that person.” “Next time I see my family I’ll have that conversation.” “I’ll set boundaries and slow down once school is over.”  It is taking a risk to listen to that Gut feeling – the still, small voice - HERE and NOW in your present and in your immediate surroundings. Not always in another country, and not always later, when your kids are grown or you’re retired from your job.  But what you feel the Spirit calling you to right NOW.

When I do this, I soon notice I begin to get messy. It’s not neat and easy and clean! But it’s worth it. It is truly LIVING. And, like the broken, I find myself calling out to God for answers. When my best efforts have failed, I am left with nothing to cling to but frail faith. In a strange twist of divine irony, those who would extend mercy discover that they themselves are in need of mercy. Mercy from a great big God who is more than willing to give it. And I begin to realize that in this whole process, God is changing me. And THAT is where the task at hand starts!

Feliz Navidad

Merry Christmas!!!

I hope you enjoy the peace and hope that today brings...

I hope you feel the love of the day from family and friends, near and far...

And because of Christmas, I hope you know how valuable and worthy YOU are to this world...just like all the children in this video!

Sending lots of love to wherever you are - Kimberlee

Christmas Party!!!

Last night, we had the annual Christmas Party at the Girls Home.

Lots of fun, decorations, laughter, food, singing, and dancing....

Plates piled high!

Loubens enjoying his Christmas dinner!

Ketia - so precious!

Yummy Haitian food!

Each child got a special gift from Mommy Cazeau, the founder of the Girls and Boys Homes.

The older girls MC the evening and make sure everything goes according to the agenda. There is lots of singing, solos, and excitement! All done in their finest outfits!

The children begged for me to 'get out your music'. We spent the night dancing away to all the dances we have learned! Such a fun way to celebrate Christmas!

Joyeux Noël...

What happens when I leave my camera alone...

Going to the girls home for the first time in 2 months was great!

Their huge hugs and kisses and excitement were contagious.

And they even left me smiling hours later when I got home and checked my camera to find this...

Took off my flip-flops for one second....

And here they are!

Here comes the bride...

The gentle face touch just adds to this picture! Love these girls!

Dramatic pose on the bed...obviously needed sunglasses for the final touch!

Group shot!

Look at that sass!

Feed Your Fool

I try not to write too many posts that don't directly tie into what I am doing in Haiti. I also try not to post anything unless I have written or experienced it myself.

Tonight, I break the rules.

I just arrived back in Haiti 24 hours ago. All is well! Yes, I'm still apprehensive. And yes, there are times when I wonder what the heck I'm doing. But, for the most part, I'm at peace! And I'm excited to be back!

“I must learn to love the fool in me–the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries. It alone protects me against that utterly self-controlled, masterful tyrant whom I also harbor and who would rob me of my human aliveness, humility, and dignity but for my Fool.”
Theodore Isaac Rubin (born 1923);
psychiatrist, author

Friends….Feed Your Fool!  Feed her with good music, art, food, friends, rest whatever it takes! (living in Haiti). Grow her up, don’t let her die!! Invite her forward and cherish her!!  She’s precious and she’s the world changer.

And when folks suggest that you act/behave/think more wisely don’t forget. . .

1 Corinthians 1:27 But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.

That is all.
Love,  A Professional Weak Fool
(taken from http://momastery.com/blog/)

The view from inside my bed...mosquito net and fan = essentials!

Fall 2012 Video Update - Good Samaritan Ministries

Bringing OUR Mission Into THE Mission

AwakenHaiti Benefit

 

EXPERIENCE... what God has been doing

DISCOVER... where He is leading
CONNECT... with AWAKENHAITI staff, team & friends
JOIN... the exciting AWAKENHAITI Journey!

Following the program, please join us for dessert and coffee and visit with AWAKENHAITIʼs leadership and in-country staff. 

All funds received will be utilized for the ongoing effort to build community among those AWAKENHAITI is coming alongside, through job creation and providing opportunities to serve and share Christʼs love in their community. 

**Childcare will be provided for children 3 years of age and under. Please e-mail childsponsors@awakenhaiti.org with the number and ages of children you plan to bring to the childcare room.**

Thank you for your continued support!
The AWAKENHAITI Leadership Team

Roller Coaster

Well, to say the least, it has been quite an eventful month for me! From abruptly returning home from Haiti in the beginning of October (if you don't know the details, feel free to ask!), not knowing how long I would be home for, learning it wouldn't be until December that I would return to Haiti, deciding to live with my parents, being blessed with a car, figuring out what my day-to-day responsibilities would be, and in all that trying to just stay in God's presence in each moment...it certainly has been a roller coaster!

To update you quickly on what the last few weeks of my life have felt like: It seems pretty chaotic inside my soul! There are moments of peace, moments of confusion and questions, moments of uncertainty, moments of great joy and love, moments of "What the heck did I do with my life?", and moments of running from God. As much of a struggle as it was to live in Haiti and feel like God stripped everything away that I was dependent on...I miss it! I was finally learning to depend on Him and be comforted by HIM ALONE, and it was GOOD! Then, to so drastically be thrown back into life here in the States was hard...it's still hard. And in the midst of all of this, I can already see some important things God is using this time for in my life. My life feels so bi-polar right now! :)

There is a book that I have quoted multiple times while on this 'Haiti' journey. It's called Hinds' Feet on High Places. It is the story of Much-Afraid's journey to the High Places God has called her to. Often I have found parts of it that speak DIRECTLY to what I am going through. This morning was no different:

For one black, awful moment Much-Afraid really considered the possibility of following the Shepherd no longer, of turning back. She need not go on. There was absolutely no compulsion about it. She had been following this strange path with her two companions (sorrow and suffering) as guides simply because it was the Shepherd's choice for her. It was not the way which she naturally wanted to go. Now she could make her own choice. Her sorrow and suffering could be ended at once, and she could plan her life in the way she liked best, without the Shepherd.

..."Shepherd," she shrieked, "Shepherd! Shepherd! Help me! Where are you? Don't leave me!" Next instant she was clinging to him, trembling from head to foot, and sobbing over and over again, "You may do anything, Shepherd. You may ask anything- only don't let me turn back. O my Lord, don't let me leave you. Entreat me not to leave thee nor to return from following after thee." Then as she continued to cling to him she sobbed out, "If you can deceive me, my Lord, about the promise and the hinds' feet and the new name or anything else, you may, indeed you may; only don't let me leave you. Don't let anything turn me back. This path looked so wrong I could hardly believe it was the right one," and she sobbed bitterly.

He lifted her up, supported her by his arm, and with his own hand wiped the tears from her cheeks, then said in his strong, cheery voice,"There is no question of your turning back, Much-Afraid. No one, not even your own shrinking heart, can pluck you out of my hand. Don't you remember what I told you before? 'This delay is not unto death but for the glory of God.' You haven't forgotten already the lesson you have been learning, have you?"

And what was that lesson for me??...to TRUST Him - that in this "Land Between" God is at work! Even though I wrestle and run, when those moments come and I surrender, God is using them. He is using them to transform me in this Land Between...that the place I least thought I would be, or least desired to be is where GREAT transformation happens! My job is to TRUST HIM in that, to rest in that!

Thank you for taking the time to read this post! I pray that you may be encouraged by the 'mess of my life' it often feels like! That, together, we can cry out "Help me, help me, help me" and TRUST that His will is being done!

Fall 2012 Newsletter

AWAKENHAITI has posted our Fall 2012 Newsletter.

Take a look to read about:

-  updates on the children of the Good Samaritan homes;
-  the building of the medical and dental clinic in Canaan;
-  the transforming power of a trip to Haiti;
-  a farewell piece to Vanessa and Drew.

Mother, May I

In John 16:33 it says, "I have told you these things, so that in me you MAY have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

I just always thought of this as a general, "Oh yes, I can have peace. God has won the world, blah blah blah." And then I would go about my day...getting wrapped up in a to-do list, concerned of what someone was thinking of me/how I was living, worrying about my future, afraid in a certain circumstance, etc.

Most of the time, my day consists of 'not' peace, maybe brief peaceful moments, but not peace as a whole.

But, because of some wise words I just heard about this verse, I now think of it like the game, Mother May I. "Mother, may I take 2 steps forward?" "Yes, you may take 2 steps forward. I give you permission."

MAY = signifies permission granted.

In this verse, God is saying we MAY have peace. He has given us permission to have peace at ALL times. In the time when an assignment is due and your stressing to get it done. In the times when you hear something late at night and its dark outside. In the times when you don't know if you'll be able to find a job, or have enough money. Or, in the times when you have no idea what your future holds.

God says, I give you permission to have peace, RIGHT NOW.

But, do I have to take 2 steps? Do I have to have peace? NO, it is my choice. Because God has already overcome the world, none of the outcomes of the above scenarios really matter. I may choose to have peace in that.

I guess I can't really explain exactly what I mean, what I'm learning. But it is something that has been on my heart, especially this last week as I have felt the pull to not choose peace.

But there is a still small voice I hear...Father, may I have peace in this circumstance? YES, you MAY have peace even in this!

Beautiful Feet!

So, my walk to the Girls Home today was fairly uneventful...until halfway through.

I was walking down the dirt path when I came along 4 men doing some construction of sorts. To me, it looked as if they were basically shoveling sand and small rock piles. It looked a little muddy but not too bad. I decided to go to the far left of the men and their piles. Well, unbeknownst to me, to the far left, they were shoveling the sand and rocks into water...almost creating some sort of cement like material.

Well...guess who stepped right in it? I took one step and sunk like quicksand. And before I knew it, my other foot stepped in as well!!

Beautiful feet!

You should have heard these men. At first they gasped and I think were afraid of what my reaction would be. As soon as they saw me start laughing, they about died. They couldn't get it together.

There I was covered in this mixture up to my shins completely embarrassed and laughing, and there they were seeming to feel bad and laughing as well. We didn't speak the same language or probably have much in common at all, but we just stood together laughing. With my limited Creole I said, "Mal jodia" which means bad day. That's all I could think of!

We waved goodbye and I continued on my journey to the girls home. That was one of the first times I think people stared not at my white skin color, but directly at my feet. I got some pretty weird looks!

When the door to the girls home opened up, their faces were hilarious. Shocked, yet trying to hide their amusement at the same time. As soon as I laughed, they also lost it! They immediately took my arm, hurriedly pulled me back to the laundry area, sat me down, took off my shoes and began scrubbing. One by one, more girls came out to see the sight! They scrubbed and scrubbed until my shoes were clean. And a few of them grabbed a bucket of water and began washing my feet!

“The feet of those who bring the Good News are beautiful.”... How beautiful are the feet of the girls who washed MY feet and shoes!

Washing MY feet, serving ME...so kind! It was a sweet little reminder of God's goodness. Each day that I spend at the Girls Home is showing me how much these kids truly are a family. It's pretty amazing...muddy feet and all!

They even found a pair of flip-flops for me to wear as my shoes dried on the roof.

Wynne Farm - Part 3

More pictures of our time at the field trip, and the rainy ride home!

Visitors...

Pines in Haiti!

Exotic plant!

Bamboo shoot

Artwork on a piece of bamboo.

Nothing is wasted!!

Le Toilet

A plant used to make clothe, ropes, etc. out of the strands of leaves.

Not sure what, but some sort of fruit.

The truck ride home...I know its really blurry, but that's what you get on a moving truck! It started raining so everyone moved from sitting on the benches on the sides, to standing by holding onto the railing in the middle. It was hilarious...so much squealing, falling, laughing, and even singing.

A short video clip of the ride home..."One of these things is not like the other one" ha

Wynne Farm: Part II – Everything Has a Purpose

-->Continued...

“He is coming for me???” What??

Ok, those words are not ones I was hoping would be spoken to me at any point while living in Haiti…for an instant (mind you, a very brief instant) I really thought Jacque meant this man was coming to get me, to take me away, far far away! :)…

But seeing that big Haitian smile as he approached the truck, I realized the Creole conversation I was listening to was that this man (Ajoun) was sent into the ‘town’ to look for us. Jane Wynne knew we were coming and so she sent him to find us ( I guess it’s not every day you have a huge truck with 28 kids sitting in the back just driving through town). Again, long story short, we had driven to Wynne Farms but the educational portion was actually done at Jane’s house, not the farms. Oh well, we had FINALLY made it!

The inside of the house. Lovely!

Jane, standing by the door of her house, having a discussion about the environment with the kids. The sliver of the man in the doorway with the yellow shirt is the guy who came to find us.

The kids, intently listening.

Some of the items we would be making and using today.

We drove to her house, not far away, and began the day. Jane talked for about 30 minutes (mostly in Creole, but a little English) about the environment, what that means to us, and how important it is to us.  The theme I heard her say a few times was that “Everything has a purpose.” EVERYTHING. From the plastic bags used to sell food items, the plastic water bottles that hold soda, each and every plant and living creature, even down to the waste creatures excrete…EVERYTHING has a purpose!

And clearly, with the day I had been having, THIS spoke to me. Everything has a purpose. Not just the plastic bottles we would be using today but each person that was there. Each child. Each day. Each ‘failed’ day. Each moment. Each season in life that leaves you asking, “Why?” The seen and the unseen. I do believe Jane has it right…Everything has a purpose.

With that being said, let me take you through the rest of the day. The kids got split into 4 groups and taken to a station for about 30 minutes. The stations were amazing! The Haitians who taught each station were wonderful, and the activities at each station were interesting and fun. The kids paid such good attention and were wonderful ‘students’. The following pictures will tell you about each station:

1. Plastic Bottles

At this station, the kids learned to make jewelry out of plastic water bottles:

Cutting the plastic bottles into strips...

Folding the strips into tight pieces...

The kids were SO incredibly focused during this task.

Making sure they have it right...

The final product!

These ones were made into earrings and sold in the gift shop...maybe a possibility for our kids to make and sell, too?

2. Making Paper & Briquettes

This station used scraps of old paper to make sheets of paper and briquettes, which are used to burn for cooking:

Group number 2

I don't think you can listen any closer than that...look at those faces!

Crushing up the paper...

Laying the flattened out piece down to dry

Crushing the paper down to make a briquette...

Laying the wet briquettes out to dry...

Drying in the sun.

A finished briquette burns long enough to make 4 pots of rice!

So proud of their creations!

Smiles all around...

And more smiles!

 Watch the video of some of the younger kids making a briquette!

3. Plastic Bag Knitting

At this station the kids learned how to knit out of plastic bags:

Cutting the bags into strips...notice the completed purses lying on the table.

Knitting.

And more knitting.

I LOVE this video...not just because the girls are learning to knit, but because it is such a great example of how the girls really are a 'family' to each other. I love how the older ones are always taking care of and helping the younger ones! So sweet.

4. The Garden and Bamboo

This station we got to walk through the yard/garden and see lots of neat plants, flowers, and other things:

Trying to be 'artsy', ha...the entrance to the gardens.

Five gallon water jugs used to grow strawberries!

Yum! Each person got to taste one. BTW, strawberries in Haiti are about $8 a small container. Won't be having them anytime soon!

Bamboo!

When this bamboo begins to grow, it grows 1 foot per day. A notch, that you see, per day...Amazing!

Lots of uses for bamboo...building houses, jewelry, burning, furniture, and more!

Composting in the hot, hot sun!

Vermiculture - lots of worms used to eat trash and make soil! Everything has a purpose!